i am a type a personality. i follow the rules, because that's why they are there. there are reasons. i only bend or break them when i think they are dangerous or bad. but otherwise, no. i just do what i'm supposed to do.
i get really annoyed when other people don't.
for instance. what's the point of reserving seats on my train journey when someone else is invariably going to be sitting in my seat? i have to face forward or i get motion-sick. so when i order my tickets, i request a forward-facing window seat. the train people put a 'reserved' sign on my seat. clearly marked.
and yet, when i board, there is someone in my seat. the one clearly marked as reserved.
that's my seat, i politely say. i reserved it.
well, there are plenty of other seats. just pick another, they say.
i don't want another, i say. that's why i reserved THAT one.
well, someone was in my seat, so i sat here. go and do likewise, they say (although not usually so articulately).
grrrrrr. i glare at them.
but i always have to go off and hope to find an open seat which fits my specifications. and always, always, always this kind of thing goes on all around me.
what is the point, train companies, of allowing me to reserve a seat if i'm not going to actually get the seat? your train people don't care. even when i explain and ask for their help. they also tell me to just pick another seat.
seriously?! what's the point of that?!
i do not like people breaking rules like that. no harm done, you say? perhaps. but it's damn annoying, that's for sure.
Saturday 5 December 2009
Tuesday 1 December 2009
that's my seat
so i met my friend for lunch in the student union the other week. yes, it was busy time of day. no, there were not many seats. i got there early, and grabbed a seat for myself and the three other people who were to join me. while i was waiting, a few people came and asked if they could sit there. they were disappointed but moved on when i said i was meeting friends.
my friends arrived. one of them stayed at the seats while the others of us when to order and get our food (i had to write my friend's order on my hand so i wouldn't forget). after waiting forever in the long line, i got up to the till and discovered they didn't have what my friend had asked for (a certain cookie). so i texted her to find out if she wanted something else. she gave me her revised order, and told me that some girl was sitting in my seat, even though she had been told that people were sitting there.
seriously?! i had to see this...
so i walked back to our seats. all my stuff--coat, bags, etc-- were on the end of the bench where i had been sitting. this was easily a three person bench. this girl was sitting RIGHT BY MY STUFF. not on the empty far end of the bench, but right on top of my coat. wtf, girl?!
i walked up, and knowing that my friend had already told this freak that there were people sitting there, i said: that's my seat. she looked at me like i was the one out of line, and scooted down a little to the other end. just then the other people came up, and i said: they are with us. she looked at me real snooty-like and finally gathered up her stuff. my friend and i just looked at each other in disbelief.
turns out, she had come up while my friend was holding our seats and just sat down. didn't ask if there was room, didn't mind that all my stuff was right there... just sat down. my friend said, my friends are sitting there. freak says, they aren't here now. friend says, they are getting food and will be right back. freak says, i'll move if they come back. then i came back, and she acted like i was the freak.
come on, people. you don't just sit down practically on top of someone else's stuff. i don't care how crowded a place is... you don't just make yourself at home where there are obviously other people, without even asking. if there is room, i don't mind sharing the space. but give me a break!
freak.
my friends arrived. one of them stayed at the seats while the others of us when to order and get our food (i had to write my friend's order on my hand so i wouldn't forget). after waiting forever in the long line, i got up to the till and discovered they didn't have what my friend had asked for (a certain cookie). so i texted her to find out if she wanted something else. she gave me her revised order, and told me that some girl was sitting in my seat, even though she had been told that people were sitting there.
seriously?! i had to see this...
so i walked back to our seats. all my stuff--coat, bags, etc-- were on the end of the bench where i had been sitting. this was easily a three person bench. this girl was sitting RIGHT BY MY STUFF. not on the empty far end of the bench, but right on top of my coat. wtf, girl?!
i walked up, and knowing that my friend had already told this freak that there were people sitting there, i said: that's my seat. she looked at me like i was the one out of line, and scooted down a little to the other end. just then the other people came up, and i said: they are with us. she looked at me real snooty-like and finally gathered up her stuff. my friend and i just looked at each other in disbelief.
turns out, she had come up while my friend was holding our seats and just sat down. didn't ask if there was room, didn't mind that all my stuff was right there... just sat down. my friend said, my friends are sitting there. freak says, they aren't here now. friend says, they are getting food and will be right back. freak says, i'll move if they come back. then i came back, and she acted like i was the freak.
come on, people. you don't just sit down practically on top of someone else's stuff. i don't care how crowded a place is... you don't just make yourself at home where there are obviously other people, without even asking. if there is room, i don't mind sharing the space. but give me a break!
freak.
Sunday 1 November 2009
could you make it any more difficult?
if you are going to ask someone to do you the favour of bringing your car to pick you up at the airport, there are a few things you should not do.
first, don't make it so difficult for me to get your keys. especially when you already live a 40 minute walk or an expensive bus ride away. and when you have three housemates who won't leave the keys out for me, so that i have to mess up my lazy saturday earlier than i would like so that i can meet them somewhere in town to get them. not to mention all the fuss trying to arrange even that with them.
second, don't leave your tank on empty. it makes me nervous as to whether i'll even make it to the airport in the first place, and that's not nice. and there is no way i'm going to fill your tank for you.
third, leave a rag in your car if it is prone to fogging up inside. it took me forever to get all the water off the inside. gross.
at least bringing me goodies back makes up for a wee bit.
first, don't make it so difficult for me to get your keys. especially when you already live a 40 minute walk or an expensive bus ride away. and when you have three housemates who won't leave the keys out for me, so that i have to mess up my lazy saturday earlier than i would like so that i can meet them somewhere in town to get them. not to mention all the fuss trying to arrange even that with them.
second, don't leave your tank on empty. it makes me nervous as to whether i'll even make it to the airport in the first place, and that's not nice. and there is no way i'm going to fill your tank for you.
third, leave a rag in your car if it is prone to fogging up inside. it took me forever to get all the water off the inside. gross.
at least bringing me goodies back makes up for a wee bit.
Thursday 8 October 2009
Dear Local Bus Company
dear local bus company,
i have been sympathetic to your stike action as long as i can. now that it's over, i have a few things to say to you.
first off, you have a monopoly in this town. you already charge us, your customers, more than we would pay anywhere else in the country. and yet you strike for more money? and put us at an inconvenience by your lack of service? that hardly seems to be targeting the right group.
secondly, you are never on schedule, even when you are supposedly running on schedule. i cannot tell you how many times i've waited half an hour or more for a bus that is supposed to come every ten minutes, just to see three go back literally bumper to bumper in the opposite direction. what the hell?
thirdly, why do you think it's okay to leave people standing at the bus stop, when they are obviously waiting for you? under the shelter, at the curb, tickets out... and you whizz on by. even after making eye contact. at 10pm. with only one other bus due after that. not cool, driver. really, not cool.
fourth, why do you cut the only fare i use (a student day pass) with no warning? i bought it one day; the next day i ask for it and am told you don't sell them. what the hell? i just bought one yesterday, and no one mentioned they were being discontinued. no signs on buses. no notice on the website. nothing. now i have to pay full fare, or buy a weekly/monthly/yearly pass? give me a break. you suck.
luckily for me, i don't often need you. and believe me, i won't be giving you any of my money any more than i absolutely have to. you have lost this occasional customer. i hope that's the outcome you were hoping for with your strike action.
sincerely,
on my own two feet
i have been sympathetic to your stike action as long as i can. now that it's over, i have a few things to say to you.
first off, you have a monopoly in this town. you already charge us, your customers, more than we would pay anywhere else in the country. and yet you strike for more money? and put us at an inconvenience by your lack of service? that hardly seems to be targeting the right group.
secondly, you are never on schedule, even when you are supposedly running on schedule. i cannot tell you how many times i've waited half an hour or more for a bus that is supposed to come every ten minutes, just to see three go back literally bumper to bumper in the opposite direction. what the hell?
thirdly, why do you think it's okay to leave people standing at the bus stop, when they are obviously waiting for you? under the shelter, at the curb, tickets out... and you whizz on by. even after making eye contact. at 10pm. with only one other bus due after that. not cool, driver. really, not cool.
fourth, why do you cut the only fare i use (a student day pass) with no warning? i bought it one day; the next day i ask for it and am told you don't sell them. what the hell? i just bought one yesterday, and no one mentioned they were being discontinued. no signs on buses. no notice on the website. nothing. now i have to pay full fare, or buy a weekly/monthly/yearly pass? give me a break. you suck.
luckily for me, i don't often need you. and believe me, i won't be giving you any of my money any more than i absolutely have to. you have lost this occasional customer. i hope that's the outcome you were hoping for with your strike action.
sincerely,
on my own two feet
Tuesday 6 October 2009
Smelly Cat
oh, sure. it's funny when phoebe sings about it on friends. and sure, it's funny when it's someone else who is complaining about it.
i am SO TIRED of these damn cats stinking up the flat. it's not a big flat; their stench permeates every inch of it.
perhaps if they were mine, it would be different. but they aren't. they come with the flat, and belong to K. so not only do i have to deal with shedding cat hair on every inch of every surface, and their yowling night and day because they think they are starving to death if they don't have treats in their bowls, and their claws tearing everything to shreds, and them pestering me to death for attention all. the. time, and them being constantly underfoot no matter where i go, and having to feed and clean their litterbox when K is gone...
as if all that weren't enough, they stink. big time. perhaps it's cheap litter. perhaps it's overeating. perhaps it's my sensitve nose. but i don't care. there are times when i have to cover my nose with my shirt because they reek so damn bad.
and THEN they come in the lounge, drag-assing their way around the loveseat or the rug. don't bring your stench in here. and stop scratching your ass where i relax!
i hate indoor pets right about now.
i am SO TIRED of these damn cats stinking up the flat. it's not a big flat; their stench permeates every inch of it.
perhaps if they were mine, it would be different. but they aren't. they come with the flat, and belong to K. so not only do i have to deal with shedding cat hair on every inch of every surface, and their yowling night and day because they think they are starving to death if they don't have treats in their bowls, and their claws tearing everything to shreds, and them pestering me to death for attention all. the. time, and them being constantly underfoot no matter where i go, and having to feed and clean their litterbox when K is gone...
as if all that weren't enough, they stink. big time. perhaps it's cheap litter. perhaps it's overeating. perhaps it's my sensitve nose. but i don't care. there are times when i have to cover my nose with my shirt because they reek so damn bad.
and THEN they come in the lounge, drag-assing their way around the loveseat or the rug. don't bring your stench in here. and stop scratching your ass where i relax!
i hate indoor pets right about now.
Sunday 13 September 2009
Unannounced
i love surprises. i don't want to know what gifts you've gotten me until i open them-- on the occasion, and not before. i love parties i don't know about in advance. i love running into people that i didn't expect to see. and getting someting in the post that i didn't order or expect? brilliant.
i love surprises.
okay. i love GOOD surprises.
is there a word for a bad surprise? a shock, perhaps? or being startled? or... i don't know. something else?
yesterday, i got a bad surprise. it's not the first time. sadly, it happens a good bit. my flatmate's boyfriend showed up for the weekend. which is fine, really. i don't mind him; i just would like to know that he'd coming before the buzzer sounds. is that too much to ask?
i can sometimes guess when he might be coming. K (my flatmate) will stock up the fridge (which never happens otherwise, as K rarely eats anything here but ready-meals). and clean like crazy. and be home on a Saturday. usually K works all weekend (or is at least somewhere other than here... i haven't actually asked if it's work or not). so i'm pretty used to being on my own all weekend. lazying around on the sofa in my pyjamas, watching tv, playing online, whatever. not doing the dishes til sunday night, so they are at least done by the time K gets back on monday. typical stuff like that.
but yesterday, K comes home from work in the afternoon. and stays, instead of rushing off again as per usual. and then... buzzzzz. someone is wanting to be let in. damn it. thankfully this time, they had plans for the theatre, so i still ended up with the flat to myself last night. but once they were back, it was third wheel time for me. so i went to bed early. not that it made any difference.
when i went to get up and ready for church this morning, the bathroom was occupied. i waited and waited and waited... but to no avail. by the time they were both ready (after extended baths or showers or what have you), it was too late for me to get ready and walk the thirty minutes or so to church. bah. so i went back to bed until they left. and now i'm sitting here wondering when they'll be back, because i didn't bother to shower or get dressed. no point in going out now. still in my pjs.
i guess i'll just retreat to my room again when and if they return. and wish that next time, K would give me a little warning before the boyfriend comes over. it's not him being here that bothers me; it's the very bad surprise of not being prepared for company til he's here.
grrrrr. i hate those kind of surprises. why can't i just get a little hint ahead of time? is that so hard?
i love surprises.
okay. i love GOOD surprises.
is there a word for a bad surprise? a shock, perhaps? or being startled? or... i don't know. something else?
yesterday, i got a bad surprise. it's not the first time. sadly, it happens a good bit. my flatmate's boyfriend showed up for the weekend. which is fine, really. i don't mind him; i just would like to know that he'd coming before the buzzer sounds. is that too much to ask?
i can sometimes guess when he might be coming. K (my flatmate) will stock up the fridge (which never happens otherwise, as K rarely eats anything here but ready-meals). and clean like crazy. and be home on a Saturday. usually K works all weekend (or is at least somewhere other than here... i haven't actually asked if it's work or not). so i'm pretty used to being on my own all weekend. lazying around on the sofa in my pyjamas, watching tv, playing online, whatever. not doing the dishes til sunday night, so they are at least done by the time K gets back on monday. typical stuff like that.
but yesterday, K comes home from work in the afternoon. and stays, instead of rushing off again as per usual. and then... buzzzzz. someone is wanting to be let in. damn it. thankfully this time, they had plans for the theatre, so i still ended up with the flat to myself last night. but once they were back, it was third wheel time for me. so i went to bed early. not that it made any difference.
when i went to get up and ready for church this morning, the bathroom was occupied. i waited and waited and waited... but to no avail. by the time they were both ready (after extended baths or showers or what have you), it was too late for me to get ready and walk the thirty minutes or so to church. bah. so i went back to bed until they left. and now i'm sitting here wondering when they'll be back, because i didn't bother to shower or get dressed. no point in going out now. still in my pjs.
i guess i'll just retreat to my room again when and if they return. and wish that next time, K would give me a little warning before the boyfriend comes over. it's not him being here that bothers me; it's the very bad surprise of not being prepared for company til he's here.
grrrrr. i hate those kind of surprises. why can't i just get a little hint ahead of time? is that so hard?
Thursday 27 August 2009
Friends? Really? *raises eyebrow*
i'm on facebook, because really, who isn't these days? i resisted for a long time, which is another story in itself. but now i'm totally tuned in and addicted. it helps me waste lots of time i should be using to be productive. which is the not-so-good side. but it does help me keep in touch with friends who are far away, which is good, because i am quite rubbish at keeping in touch with people these days. i used to be good at it, but that is another story, as well. so, facebook. it helps me keep in touch, to know what's going on with people and to be able to write just a few words to let them know i'm thinking about them, without feeling guilty for sending an email with just a few words. plus, it's put me back in touch with people i had wondered about for years but had no idea how or where to find them. long lost friends found. it's a beautiful thing.
but those aren't the problem. the problem is this: friend requests from people with whom i either parted with on unfriendly terms, or with whom i was never friends in the first place. so we went to the same high school-- big deal. there were more than 400 people just in my graduating class. that doesn't make us all friends. sure, i might know your name. i might possibly be able to make small talk with you if we ever happen to run into each other. but would i go out of my way to speak to you? would i definitely recognise you? would i care what you've been up to for the past number of years? no. because we weren't friends. i had friends in high school; i wasn't one of the loners. and i knew a lot more people than i would consider my friends-- acquantainces, i guess. i know some people just like racking up as many friends as they can, to show they are still cool... or to look cool now when they weren't then. but seriously, people-- what's the point? if i never talked with you, hung out with you, cared about the details of your life then, why would i now? and vice versa-- if you didn't care about me then, why should i care about you now? it's ridiculous. i. don't. care.
and if you are using a name that you didn't have when i knew you, how am i even going to know if i know you or not? i just get a request from 'sasquatch pingu' or whatever it may be, how the hell am i supposed to know that it is really my best friend from seventh grade or whatever? especially when you don't have a photo of yourself. c'mon people. personal note to say, hey, it's so-and-so, i'm married and changed my name. that would help.
then there are those people who i would have considered friends once, but are not any longer. i have one request sitting there right now, because i can't figure out what to do about it. yes, we went to college together for two years. yes, for part of that time i considered you a friend. but you talked about me behind my back, told my secrets, embarrassed me, hurt me, made fun of me... and you expected that i would want to be your friend? we stopped being friends back then, or didn't you notice? and you think that just because time has passed, i've forgotten how you treated me? or that it doesn't matter? or maybe you have a different view of that reality? i don't know. i can't decide if it's worth writing to you to tell you off about it, or just to ignore your request, or accept it to see what you're up to and then delete you? i can't make up my mind. but really, what makes you think i want to be your friend?
we. are. not. friends.
not even virtual ones. sheesh.
but those aren't the problem. the problem is this: friend requests from people with whom i either parted with on unfriendly terms, or with whom i was never friends in the first place. so we went to the same high school-- big deal. there were more than 400 people just in my graduating class. that doesn't make us all friends. sure, i might know your name. i might possibly be able to make small talk with you if we ever happen to run into each other. but would i go out of my way to speak to you? would i definitely recognise you? would i care what you've been up to for the past number of years? no. because we weren't friends. i had friends in high school; i wasn't one of the loners. and i knew a lot more people than i would consider my friends-- acquantainces, i guess. i know some people just like racking up as many friends as they can, to show they are still cool... or to look cool now when they weren't then. but seriously, people-- what's the point? if i never talked with you, hung out with you, cared about the details of your life then, why would i now? and vice versa-- if you didn't care about me then, why should i care about you now? it's ridiculous. i. don't. care.
and if you are using a name that you didn't have when i knew you, how am i even going to know if i know you or not? i just get a request from 'sasquatch pingu' or whatever it may be, how the hell am i supposed to know that it is really my best friend from seventh grade or whatever? especially when you don't have a photo of yourself. c'mon people. personal note to say, hey, it's so-and-so, i'm married and changed my name. that would help.
then there are those people who i would have considered friends once, but are not any longer. i have one request sitting there right now, because i can't figure out what to do about it. yes, we went to college together for two years. yes, for part of that time i considered you a friend. but you talked about me behind my back, told my secrets, embarrassed me, hurt me, made fun of me... and you expected that i would want to be your friend? we stopped being friends back then, or didn't you notice? and you think that just because time has passed, i've forgotten how you treated me? or that it doesn't matter? or maybe you have a different view of that reality? i don't know. i can't decide if it's worth writing to you to tell you off about it, or just to ignore your request, or accept it to see what you're up to and then delete you? i can't make up my mind. but really, what makes you think i want to be your friend?
we. are. not. friends.
not even virtual ones. sheesh.
Monday 24 August 2009
an experiment
i don't have a quick temper. it takes a lot for me to actually get angry, but once i do, i can hold a grudge with the best of them. however, i am easily annoyed. lots of things annoy me, all the time. these things i get over quickly, usually... but it tends to annoy people around me when i complain about them. so here i am. using this place to rant about the things that annoy me... as well as the things that i am angry about. still angry about, in some cases.
i have an image to protect, hence the web address name. i am a nice girl. sweet, polite, considerate, helpful. that is how others see me, and how i mostly see myself. but i know that i have this dark side, this darkness inside, that i never let out. okay, that i rarely let out. but i need to be honest about who i am sometimes. i need to let that dark side of me speak. ta-dah!
why is it easier to talk to strangers about some things? why am i writing this anonymous blog for you, dear readers, instead of talking to my friends and family? well, that's pretty easy. you don't know me. you don't have any preconceived ideas about who i am, you don't expect anything from me, you won't be shocked or offended or hurt by the things i might say. okay, i guess you might... but then, i don't know you, so i don't really care how you react. if you don't like what i say, you don't have to keep reading. i guess it's the freedom of being able to say what i really think and feel, without having to worry about how it will be received or who will be judging me... because even if you are sitting there judging me right now, i don't know it. it's really very freeing. and maybe someone out there might even understand me a bit, or sympathise, or even agree.
maybe by letting my dark side into the light, i might be encouraging someone else who feels like they have to stay hidden, keep many of the 'real' parts of themselves tucked away deep inside. we all want to know, and be known... i guess i'm mostly hoping that this will help me better know myself, to integrate my good and not-so-good bits into a better, more whole self. and if anyone else finds anything good from this along the way, then yay. because i know i can't be the only one who feels like she is two different people-- the one she shows, and the one she feels she has to hide.
i have an image to protect, hence the web address name. i am a nice girl. sweet, polite, considerate, helpful. that is how others see me, and how i mostly see myself. but i know that i have this dark side, this darkness inside, that i never let out. okay, that i rarely let out. but i need to be honest about who i am sometimes. i need to let that dark side of me speak. ta-dah!
why is it easier to talk to strangers about some things? why am i writing this anonymous blog for you, dear readers, instead of talking to my friends and family? well, that's pretty easy. you don't know me. you don't have any preconceived ideas about who i am, you don't expect anything from me, you won't be shocked or offended or hurt by the things i might say. okay, i guess you might... but then, i don't know you, so i don't really care how you react. if you don't like what i say, you don't have to keep reading. i guess it's the freedom of being able to say what i really think and feel, without having to worry about how it will be received or who will be judging me... because even if you are sitting there judging me right now, i don't know it. it's really very freeing. and maybe someone out there might even understand me a bit, or sympathise, or even agree.
maybe by letting my dark side into the light, i might be encouraging someone else who feels like they have to stay hidden, keep many of the 'real' parts of themselves tucked away deep inside. we all want to know, and be known... i guess i'm mostly hoping that this will help me better know myself, to integrate my good and not-so-good bits into a better, more whole self. and if anyone else finds anything good from this along the way, then yay. because i know i can't be the only one who feels like she is two different people-- the one she shows, and the one she feels she has to hide.
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