Thursday 8 April 2010

life with, and yet without

i have a decent chunk of change sitting in my bank account.  whether or not it's enough to get my visa extended is still to be seen.  what it is enough for, however, is to make my life miserable.  or at least very frustrating.  there are things i need... that i could technically even afford to buy.  but i can't.  here's my list of things i need (not even counting things i just would like to have):

fresh groceries (i did just splurge on pantry items and nonperishables to see me through
new mattress: the springs in mine are poking me
new contacts: i've been wearing my one-month disposable pair for about six months now
new glasses: my frames are about a decade old, and the prescription is nowhere near right
postage: to send my sister and brother-in-law birthday gifts (late now), and my godson/nephew his easter gift
toiletries: like hair stuff, and toothpaste, and other necessary girlie items
bus fare: 2.60 every once in a while, so i can visit friends in far parts of town
rent: luckily, my flatmate knows i'm good for it, and since he owns the place, he'll let me slide
sunglasses:  i can't go out in the light without them, but i've lost two pair in two weeks.  bah.
underclothes: yeah.  socks and underwears and bras.  mine are... well, not in good shape. 
academic expenses: to bind my thesis, pay my graduation fee, etc


i know that i am lucky to be living where i do, doing what i am, and all that stuff.  i am not literally starving (yet), and i am not in danger of being put out on the street (yet).  but i am--and having been--living well under the poverty line for quite a few years now.  it gets old.  i know how to budget, i don't splurge on luxuries very often, things like that.  but still.  it'll be so nice to actually be able to buy the things i need one day...

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